After we concluded our conversation, I began to ask, "Where are my calls?" I rewound the tape on the machine for a long time and played it back. Nothing. I began to realize that I'd missed a lot of messages.
"Oh, no, Lord, now it makes sense.”
He whispered again, "Is your joy in getting messages or in Me?"
"Yes, Lord, it's in You. I choose to believe You're still in control, even when all my messages are erased. I trust You, Lord. My heart is sad. But I know You intend only good for me, so I'll trust You in my mind and hope it filters to my heart."
It didn't filter fast. In the middle of many nights, I woke up feeling panicky. "The messages!" my mind would scream. "What did I miss? Lord, how could You have allowed that to happen?"
Then I had to consciously release disappointment and tell myself the truth: God is sovereign. He's in control. He wants what's best for me. I can trust Him.
(graphic by Stuart Miles from www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net)