home speaking topics endorsements contact

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

God's Severe Mercies in My Mom's Last Days

Me, Mom, Chuck & Karen
I wonder if sometimes we think God only leads through blessings and smooth paths. I wondered that because of the way God guided our family to bring my mom to my home. It was through a difficult situation. It is what some have called "God's severe mercies."

When my mom needed more time and care than the assisted living facility could give her, we made plans to move her into a Board and Care home. My sister, Karen, and I checked out several places and decided on one that a friend of mine passionately recommended. It seemed perfect. 

The idea of mom moving into my home wasn't a consideration because her physical needs were more than I could handle (because of my past back surgery).

So we made plans. The morning of the move, my sister and caregivers somehow got mom into Karen's car even though mom was having a particularly bad morning. She couldn't seem to become alert. That happened sometimes but didn't last this long. We knew she would rally after a while.

I stayed behind in mom's room guiding the movers about what to pack. Then I headed over to the Board and Care home, excited that mom would receive such great care.

When I arrived, Karen was in tears and the B & C home owner was angry. The owner feared mom was going to die right then and wanted to call 911. But our mom was in hospice and we had chosen this home because they took hospice patients. We were clueless why the owner was so upset and no assurances we gave seemed to help. She continued to insist we needed to move mom at least by the next day. In the meantime, the moving van had arrived and sat in the street awaiting directions. 

I had called my husband, Larry, who is a retired policeman, because I thought he could help us negotiate a solution. We still hoped to work with the owner to allow mom to move in. But when she definitely said mom couldn't stay, we became desperate to find a facility or home where we could move her. 

Then Larry spoke up and said, "Well, there is another option we haven't considered. Have mom move into our home." We all burst into tears, even the hospice nurse who was trying to help us locate a facility. As we considered that option, the nurse offered a solution for my inability to care for her. We could hire care givers to come in.

The problem was resolved. Larry and the movers headed to our home to get my mom's room ready. Other needed decisions were made and after a few hours mom was nestled safely in my guest room. At one point she exclaimed, "A dream come true" and thanked us repeatedly for welcoming her into our home.

That began the last twelve days of our mom's life. I can't imagine her not being in our home for that time. It was such a joy to have those last days with her and then to be with her as she joined Jesus in heaven. 

As you read my first sentences above, do you think it's surprising that God leads through difficult circumstances? Or does it seem like  His guidance should only come through "straight paths" and clear direction? Give me your ideas. Maybe you even have a story to tell.

4 comments:

  1. That's a great story, Kathy. I am glad that you were able to have those days with your mom before she passed. (And, I am very sorry for your loss. Even though all went well, and you know that she is in the hands of Jesus, it is still difficult. My prayers are with you.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Randi, for your wise words. I'm finding I'm tired a lot of the time and I'm learning to give myself grace to rest and go slowly through all the details as her executor. I so appreciate your loving support!

      Delete
  2. Somehow, on this side of heaven, I believe suffering and 'bumpy" paths are absolutely one of the Lord's most essential and effective tools to teach us, speak to us, redirect us, train and transform us, and evidentially bring Himself glory. God never wastes our pain and suffering. And, from start to finish, God Word tells us that suffering and glory almost always go hand and hand.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Cathy, for your sharing. I so appreciate you responding to my blog question. I totally agree. I'm so glad my mom is out of those struggles and totally free to worship Jesus so unhindered. Thanks for being there!

      Delete